I liked to play video games as a kid. I would always play this football game in which you got to create a team and play a season. I would always try to go undefeated. If i was playing poorly, or about to lose a game, I would run to the console and hit the “reset” button, and none of what had just happened counted against me. This is a good picture of how I viewed Jesus growing up. I thought of Him as a giant “reset” button. I would do my own thing; trying to become a professional pitcher, get a 4.0 gpa, land a hot girlfriend, and be rich. Eventually things would crumble in a particular area of my life and I would become depressed and guilty. When I could stand it no longer, I would go to Church and confess all of my sins and start all over again trying to please Jesus. This happened at least 1,245 times between the ages of 12 and 19. As a sophomore at the University of Nebraska, I learned that my logic was faulty. I was trying to win some type of morality game, in which I achieved some type of MVP award. I saw Jesus as the voter that I had to impress with the way I lived my life. But this wasn’t who Jesus claimed to be. As a sophomore in college I first understood the totality of the Gospel. Jesus had died so that all of the punishment for my errors wouldn’t count against me. Then he came back to life in order to live life with me in a relationship; to guide me, instruct me, encourage me, comfort me, and fight for me. One day, when I died physically, I would continue this relationship in heaven without the interruption of a messed up world. I decided then to stop playing whatever messed up game I was trying to win, and simply surrender to what God wanted for my life instead of what I wanted for my life. Since then, life has still been bumpy. I still have a lot of problems and frustrations just like I used to. The difference is that now I have hope, purpose, direction, peace, and a Savior and Lord who can do all things. I try everyday to take advantage of the fact that I have a relationship with the creator of the universe. I also want to tell as many people as possible that I have found the one thing worth living for and that Jesus is available to all, no matter the background, problems, race, gender, nationality, etc
