I’ve had a lifelong battle with depression and especially anxiety in my adult years. After a year of marriage, my husband lost his job and used the off time to go to school. After completing school, he had a hard time finding work, and was off for almost a year, during which time I got a second job and was constantly stressed about our situation. He got a job at the Post Office and our lives were looking up. Then at home one evening, an accident caused him a concussion that proved to be life-altering. He was let go from his job as he was unable to continue to work due to post concussion syndrome, which caused severe migraines, dizziness and altered vision. We spent the next year seeing tons of doctors, trying to find answers or treatments to help him feel better. All doctors said he just needed time to heal. It has been almost 2 years since the accident and his vision is still altered, causing frequent dizziness and migraines, but it is manageable enough that he can work part time now. He had no benefits from his job, as he hadn’t been there long enough, so all the finances fell on me and my two jobs. I was working 60 hour weeks, with no days off, and coming home to a hopelessly ill husband. My depression and anxiety were out of control, I just wanted to die instead of keeping going in this hopeless situation. I felt a pull to go back to church, and as I was raised in a Catholic church, I knew church to be a comforting reminder of my childhood. I also felt a pull to read a Bible I had bought at a garage sale some time ago. I had never read the Bible before, even after years of Catholic church and Holy Communion, Confirmation, etc. As my understanding grew, I felt I was not being spiritually nourished at the Catholic church I was at. I ended up at a non-denominational church after a friend invited me. It instantly felt like home. During this same time, I was taking a “Basics of Christianity” course with one other person, hosted by my boss at work. After learning in that class, and in my own study and at church, I finally learned about what Jesus had really done for me. I accepted him into my heart as my Lord and Savior, and was baptized. Shortly after that, my anxiety and depression disappeared completely. I feel more whole and full and happy than I ever have in my whole life. I know Jesus saved me from the desperate emotional situation I was in, when I wanted to give up and give in. He has strengthened my marriage even though my husband is not (yet) a believer, relieved my anxiety, and changed my heart in many ways. I know my purpose, I know whose I am. And I am so thankful to God for opening my eyes and heart to his truth.
